Today I was supposed to write about chocolate cake. I wanted to write about cake and share the delectable sweetness with you but I can’t. I was up last night with the full moon and the raging wind seething. I really can’t pretend to be anything but I am and what I am is pissed.
Every Friday for the last five plus years I have left a chocolate bar by the front door for Reg so that he has something to look forward to at the end of the week.
Today is our first Friday of official employment “freedom” and I have a dollar store bag with chocolate bars in it. I stocked up months ago.
The truth is, we were dumped. We worked so hard for this relationship to work but it is over. I am mad, sad and just tired. So tired of wanting something that is just not going to be.
This V-Day we will eat chocolate pancakes, cake and dive into that bag of dollar store treats. We will binge and be sad for the life that did not want us back.
Then the rest of our life will be in front of us. We will be together to take on the world and find a place where we are wanted.
The old dream can bite me. I am done.