You know what does not mix? Sleeping pills and staircases. Long story short, I missed the last TWO steps of the staircase. My foot swooped underneath me and I landed on TOP of my foot full force at 4 am.
This was the day I was going to see my friend Michelle for the last time before she sails away for her long-term adventure and I had huge bulges coming out of the top of my foot and my ankle and almost passed out from the pain. Fuck! Seriously? Like come on, enough already. I have been through enough of this bullshit.
Michelle being the hero that she is drove into town, took me to clinics and spent the day in waiting rooms while I saw doctors and got x-rays. They think it isn’t broken but the lab tech was like, what the hell did you do???
I had to then find a place where I could get one of those Frankenboots because I am in the basement and have to deal with stairs all the time. Turns out it was a smart call. I sprained the top of my foot, both sides of my ankle and the front and back of my leg. This is one of the few times my hyper flexibility paid off. It could have been a LOT worse. Bloody hell.
Once again I sought guidance from the High Priest and Michelle ordered the Fiery Furnace. I had already been to hell so I was like, I will take secret sauce instead. Please and thank you.
You should know this is a closet of a so-called restaurant. And people don’t seem to care that you are wearing a leg brace and are in terrible pain so you have to wait for them to get their order and leave before you can claim a stool.
Oh yeah!! This time I went for the two burgers but I was like, where is the secret sauce?
Michelle totally fell in love with her burger and hey, her cheese was actually melted! Unlike mine… OMG.
I hobbled over to the server and asked for more sauce and she obliged generously which made me much, much happier.
I REALLY wanted to go to Sweet Jesus for ice cream after being at Burger Priest (the blasphemy was almost too good to pass up) but we ended up avoiding traffic purgatory by going to Maple Leaf Dairy Ice Cream instead.
Michelle and I went to Maple Leaf Dairy Ice Cream Parlour back in 2012 together and neither of us had forgotten the humungous and generous size of their “single scoop” ice cream. Michelle ordered the red velvet which she adored.
This time I finally remembered to take her advice and sample ice creams before ordering. Because of the massive size of the ice cream I went with cappuccino. How I love cappuccino and could never get sick of it.
No, this is not the fanciest hand-churned ice cream in the city but on that hot day after lots of screaming, tears and pain this was just what I needed and I am pretty sure I only paid around $6 and got a TON of ice cream.
I want to thank all my friends on social media who have supported me through this journey who watched it unfold live online (see social media links at the top of the page). A foodie friend even made this superhero graphic for me which meant the world. I went from feeling like a complete and total loser to realizing that it is true, I will find a way to keep bringing you foodie stories and reviews somehow, some way.